There are moments in my life where I know I could have done better.
And tried harder.
Some of these moments are etched in my mind, they are there for me to reflect on, and to serve as a reminder…of just how far I have come in my journey. Sometimes, I get hung up on those mistakes that I have made. It’s in my nature, I suppose. But I do my best to move on, shed the guilt, forgive myself, and take each experience as a learning lesson.
That’s also part of my nature. I want to learn more. I want to be a better person. I want to be a better person for my kids, but more importantly I want to be better so I can feel better about ME, too. That last part? The part that I want to be better FOR ME? That may seem like it’s revolutionary…but really it’s not.
This is another reason why I try to make sure to attend the Better Me sessions with Coach Pia.
Through her own sessions with life Coach Pia Aceveda, Kris De Guzman came up with an idea that she knew would be able to help other mommas. Better Me Ph sessions with Coach Pia provide a sense of community where women can attend sessions with Coach Pia, better themselves, and in the process improve on all the other relationships that she invests in as well.
And for mommas, the most important relationships we have are with our children.
Even as a wife, I know my relationship with Nino benefits from the time I spend with Coach Pia. By investing time in myself, to reflect, to know and understand my core, I can be a better partner. I remember to communicate my needs effectively, and even if I think Nino is a mind reader sometimes, I do not wait for him to read my mind. I simply tell him.
After Kris launched her new website, I was invited (together with some other women) to attend a Better Me session in San Juan.
Because we had some new ladies joining us, Coach Pia shared what The One Core is all about. I will outline the 8 basic principles for you here, together with some take-away points that resonated with me.
But before I do that, I want to share a book with all of you called The Four Agreements, by Don Miguel Ruiz.
Coach Pia started The One Core with Pia Magalona when her husband Francis died seven years ago. Together they realized that they had a responsibility to help people with better life decisions, because “Life is, in fact, too short.”
Even if The One Core is still evolving in many ways, the principles are the same.
They want to continue to enrich the lives of others.
“THERE IS NOT ONE PROJECT THAT MEANS MORE TO ME THAN BETTER ME.” -Coach Pia
Guess what? There is not one project that means more to me than A BETTER ME, too….meaning, that I always want to improve on the person that I am today. I know Coach Pia meant that she enjoys this part of the work she does…she is investing in the collective of motherhood…she knows she is making a difference in the lives of others.
There is so much value in that.
What are the guiding principles of The One Core?
- Make Better Life Decisions
This is easier, when you know what you want in your life. You will know what you want in your life when you take time for yourself. YOU MUST TAKE TIME FOR YOU. (And in my case, not feel guilty about it.) You must take time to know who you are. HEY. This is hard. This statement is so heavy. Because you have to eliminate all distractions and take a good hard long look in the mirror.
2. Make Decisions for Yourself
Realize this much: You will make the best decision for yourself at any given time in your life. Everything is a learning experience. Please know that it takes time to develop respect for yourself, and it takes time to develop forgiveness for yourself too. But you can do this, if you are successful in identifying your core, and you are self aware.
3. People Have Inherent Wisdom
Yes we do. Every person, no matter what background or what age as wisdom. This is why when I meet someone new, I’m always so intrigued to learn more about them.
I have said many times over that my children are my greatest teachers. Don’t we learn so much from our children? I know I sure do.
4. Every Individual Grows Through Their Personal Process
Ok. Just like each and every person has inherent wisdom, they also have their own personal process that has nothing to do you WITH YOU. So, as a mother, how do we provide or create the environment for our children to be successful? We give them as many opportunities as we can to succeed.
Remember, if your mother, sister, father, brother all have their own process…your child does too. Allow them the space they need to experience what they are going through, identify for them, and then give them the opportunity to express themselves and their feelings.
5. It is Important to Achieve Balance in the 5 Aspects of Life
- Social Life
- Sense of Purpose
Each of these 5 parts to what makes up our lives are EQUALLY IMPORTANT. So, if you don’t take care of one, the other 4 parts will be affected in a negative way. Before I met Coach Pia, I would say that I need to take care of my physical, emotional, and mental health. Now, that I have a greater understanding of how to take care of myself, these 5 parts make more sense. I want to do fulfilling work, I want to have a sense of purpose, and an active social life. But I need to make sure I take care of my family and myself in the process too. They all have to be in some kind of balance for my world to be “right.”
To be honest, seeing the venn diagram that Coach Pia shows in our session for the first time, was revolutionary.
“What? You mean I don’t have to be a martyr who sacrifices everything about myself to be a good mom?”
6. People Should Have the Courage to Pursue their Dreams
Ahhh. So. Are you listening? You are never too old to go after what you want to do.
“Authentic living chooses no age, you can always still pursue that which you are passionate about.” -Coach Pia
7. We do all of this through THREE STEPS
- Self Master
- Self Development
- Self Commitment
If we are to truly know and understand our core, then we must commit to a practice of constant self evaluation. We must stay the course even when it’s discomforting to look at ourselves in the mirror. It’s not easy, this much I know.
“Every day I discover something that I didn’t like about myself.” –Coach Pia
If we are taking the time to work on ourselves, everybody benefits. Your own self awareness will be an example to others in your life. It’s actually quite liberating.
8. Genuine Humility creates Personal Success
I learn so much from my sessions with Coach Pia.
I have learned that taking care of myself is probably the most important thing I can do. I have learned that I don’t need to help others with “their core.” I merely have to stay true to my own core, sort through my issues, and remind myself that it doesn’t have to change who I am or who I want to be as a mom, a wife, a daughter, and as a woman.
This is why I will be attending the Discover Your Core Weekend with The One Core.